Put on the habit of walking in the Spirit and not the flesh. I don’t know about you, but sometimes I need a little help knowing what this actually looks like. I think Jan Silvious has done a great job in her book, Big Girl’s Don’t Whine putting some actual skin on this issue. What does it look as a woman in certain areas of our lives to walk this out? Here is an excerpt from her book.
The Big Girl knows that her capacity to think is her greatest asset. Mature thinking produces mature living, and of course childish thinking produces childish living. You have only to stop and observe how the children you know think, and you will see the problem.
A Big Girl is consistent in the way she responds. You don’t have to wonder what she will do or say. You don’t have to worry on pins and needles about what kind of mood she will be in. You know what you can count on where a Big Girl is concerned.
That characteristic sets the Big Girl apart from a Little Girl. Unlike the Big Girl, the Little Girl is inconsistent in her responses to life and people. Moodiness, self-absorption, and fragile emotions characterize the Little Girl. As a consequence, one really can’t know what to expect from her-except the unexpected.
Children (little girls) don’t think things through to their natural conclusion. They see only what is immediate.
They don’t think about how their actions will affect others.
They are unable to see more than one side to any situation.
They take things personally. “She hurt my feelings.”
They really like it best when “it’s all about me.”
They are better manipulators than negotiators. They learn early how to manipulate and whom to manipulate.
They like fairy tales where good guys always win, bad guys always lose, and everyone lives happily ever after.
They tire easily and allow fatigue to affect their general attitude and demeanor.
They do not know what is best for them, although they may protest loudly when they fail to get what they want.
Here are some ways to challenge your thinking as a Big Girl in process.
Big girls think things through to their natural conclusion. They see not only the present but the future as well.
Big girls think about how their actions will affect others.
Big girls can see more than one side to any situation.
Big girls don’t take things personally.
Big girls understand that life is never “all about me.”
Big girls are good, fair, and reasonable negotiators.
Big girls may like fairy tales, but they like true stories, too, and are well aware of the difference.
Big girls may tire, but they don’t allow their fatigue to control their general attitude and demeanor.
Big girls know what is best for them and are disciplined enough to go after it.
Big Girls overlook transgressions. They don’t spend a lot of time on the little stuff. They cut each other a lot of slack. Big Girls take the high road.
My counsel is this: Live freely, animated and motivated by God’s Spirit. Then you won’t feed the compulsions of selfishness. For there is a root of sinful self-interest in us that is at odds with a free spirit, just as the free spirit is incompatible with selfishness.
I have met both types of women above. I am drawn to the Big Girls because I can see God’s spirit working itself out in their lives. Oh, how we need more Big Girls in the Church today. Big girls that will not pass judgment only knowing one side of an issue, that will give each other the benefit of the doubt, those that realize their words and actions have the power to build up or destroy.
May our prayer today be that we walk in the Spirit and be a Big Girl.